Why Christianity Is HARD!

Aside from the myriad of theological topics that are very important when it comes to Christianity, the most difficult part of the faith is actually living it when things don't go your way. Most people THINK their issue is theological, but in reality, when people leave churches, it is primarily based on relationships that go sour.

The reason Christianity is so hard is because the core of the faith REQUIRES forgiveness but when you are hurt, angry or scared, it is difficult or may even feel impossible to forgive. Living Christianity in relationship with other people requires two things:

1. Radical forgiveness, coupled with
   
2. Appropriate self-protection

These two ideas seem antithetical but they are the bedrock, Biblical basis for the ONLY WAY Christians can actually love each other. We do this with our families, and it should be done in the church as well.

First Radical Forgiveness.
Jesus Christ and his death on the cross is the model of forgiveness and the Bible actually tells the faithful to love other Christians. Why did he die on the cross? This is the "crux" of the matter, the core of the faith. Ultimately, the only way for a human being to go to heaven is to be forgiven of his or her sins. According to the faith, there is only one way to do this - faith, through the blood of Jesus Christ. Now, we are called to forgive and many scriptures talk about it. I love this video because it epitomizes this kind of forgiveness.

You see, love is supposed to be patient, kind, content, modest, humble, selfless, slow to anger, protects others, is always trusting & hoping in others, and ultimately - regarding our topic - LOVE keeps no record of wrongs. But when feel betrayed, lied to, or otherwise mistreated by a member of the church, it is hard to let it go. Ultimately, if you are ANGRY and leaving a church, ask yourself - is this really about you not being able to forgive some sinful, broken, lying, cheating sinner who happens to be a member, or even worse, a leader, in your church? Guess what, radical forgiveness and true humility means that you also realize that you are also a sinful, broken, lying, cheating sinner! Otherwise, you wouldn't need the blood of Christ in order to be righteous. (See Romans 5:6-11) This is deep theology which Christians can not afford to ignore. There are tons of passages on forgiveness,

Second, Appropriate self-protection
I couldn't think of a good way to describe this accept for self-protection. However, this is not accurate. It's not self-protection, but more about healthy boundaries based on the absolute truth - as best as one can figure it out. For example, a physically abusive father or husband should not be tolerated but FORCED to stop his physical attacks. Bruising and beating children and wife, leaving broken skin or broken bones and black eyes is simply NOT to be accepted. It is not radical forgiveness that tolerates such behavior, it is a major lack of healthy boundaries, mixed with fear, shame, confusion, hopelessness, helplessness, and many other feelings. These feelings are then expressed through a lack of empowerment and a lack of action. In Christ, we have the power - that is, the strength, to leave the house, and take the children.

But another example might be that young girl, Rachael Scott, killed in the 1999 Columbine High incident. No one knows if the exchange between her and the killers actually took place where she is purported to have been shot in the leg and then asked if she still believed in God, to which she responded, "yes" and was then shot in the head. This may be legend or folklore but the principle is clearly communicated. Do not compromise your faith or integrity even if it means you will be hurt, abused, or killed. This same principle is echoed in American culture by movies such as the Silver Surfer who eventually was willing to die to stop the planet destroyer from continuing his heartless annihilation of entire worlds. Of course, soldiers on the battle field live and die by this principle more often than the rest of us. First responders also reflect this ideal.

The scriptures show Jesus living this principle by slipping away a number of times when the crowds were coming to seize or kill him because it was not time for his death. See John 7:30, 44, 8:20, and 10:39. Paul escaped death once by being let down through a window (See 2 Corinthians 11:32-33).


Concluding Remarks
The point here is this: We are called to be radical regarding our love for each other, especially forgiveness. All men will know you are my disciples by the love you have for each other. This love requires constant forgiveness. It is difficult to live this way when we are hurt, feel attacked, feel betrayed, or have experienced some other emotional pain which you perceive is caused by another person. However, I implore anyone who claims the name of Christ - stop fighting over things that ultimately will not matter in eternity. The real enemy is not other church members or church leaders... the real enemies are from Hell, not from earth.

Finally, if anyone I know personally feels hurt, discouraged, or attacked by me, feel free to call. Let's work it out, especially if we are member of the same congregation.